Thursday, April 21, 2011
Eating Disorders
How do you determine that you truly have an Eating Disorder? It took 30 years of complete and utter out of control eating and of the Dr. Oz show for me to realize it. I have struggle daily since I have obtained the label " Binge Eater". I am wondering if it I would have remain clueless of my disorder, would it really made a differnce. I started really montoring my food intake this week. Summer's coming and I have nothing that fits me. I refuse to buy new summer clothes.
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=( im sorry. im going thru the same thing and just finished a 2 day binge and idk what to do or where to turn or anything.
ReplyDeletethings are so tough and everytime im doing so well, bam this happens.
I am 21 years old from Australia...
ReplyDeleteFor years i have loved sweets as in my home it was always available. Coming from a ethnic family, food is a huge part of everyday life.
It shows wealth and abundance and is constantly offered regardless of whether your hungry or not.
It is also considered to be quite rude if you refuse to eat. I was a chubby child...Really really chubby. and was always teased at school along with the fact that physically I was ethnic.
It has taken years for me to accept my past and transform myself into a confidant woman.In saying that..I am still CONSTANTLY judging myself.. making excuses to visit the bathroom to see how I look and check if my belly looks bloated or large. I can admit im obsessed with my looks.
The ironic thing is.. Im wonderful at pretending i love food and enjoy eating it. I do this by getting excited over things like McDonalds or putting on a cute face and begging my boyfriend to buy me chocolate. People always tell me how confidant I am and how happy-go-lucky I can be.
Realistically I despise myself..and the fact that whatever I put into my mouth i later regret.
My weaknesses are sweets and eating for no reason. Usually out of bordom.
The choc hazelnut spread Nutella is a top contendor I have quite easily eaten over 8 tablespoons in one seating.
Chocolate of any kind, cake, choc mint cookies almost everything.
I could and have had on many occasions eaten a whole cake. At the time it didn't phase me but before I put down my spoon feel sick, guilty and usually go to purge before it gets digested.
Lucky for me I have a boyfriend who supports me and made me promise I wouldn't take it to that extent.
As I mentioned, my family doesn't understand... If i don't eat they call me "anorexic" or a "bag of bones" when im actually incredibly average in size. This plays with my mind....
I'm sorry to sit here and write to you.. when i have never met you. This is the first time in my life that I have ever opened up about my binge eating. Just feels good to know im not the only one.
Good luck with everything. Your blog is truly inspiring.
Ava x