Tomorrow is Halloween.

Yes, tomorrow is Halloween. Is this the official binge holiday. How years have I binged on this day. Really who makes a day for just begging for candy. I am going to be good. If it kills me.

Support Groups

It is so important to choose the right support group. I started one the week after I left the Dr Oz show and not really sure if it is the right one for me. If you are looking for a support group www.oa.org is a great place to start.

Nothing tastes as good as thin feels......

Today, I am beginning a new week of things I need to do for myself. Yes, just for me. My love affair with food has caused me to never take care of myself. I am official breaking up with food today. I am controlling myself for today. That's all I can ask of myself.

I was sucessful

I felt a little victory today. I said I was going to enjoy something sweet and not have guilt. I did. Me, my son and husband went on a halloween oriented trip, where we trick or treated in a old fashion village. Children and Adult were welcomed to collect goodies. I waited till the end not even tempted by the bag of sugar. Not even indulging in the donuts at the final stop. ( never really been a fan of donuts...but remember I am a binge eater) I enjoyed the cider which I had three cups of. As we drove home, I choose to eat my caramel green apple sucker which is one of my favorites and two snack size candy bars. That was it. Former Lisa, entire bag of candy gone on the ride home. How accomplished do I feel, not really sure yet. I am still trying to adknowledge my eating disorder.

I hope to inspire just one person today,

Well it's the weekend and that is the worst time for me and food. I have alot of mixed feeling after the show aired. Tons of people have told me that I am brave. Brave is probably not how I would phrase it. Maybe crazy. Because really the way I eat has been uncovered. I fretted about this day and it's here. My hope is that my story has inspired someone to take a deeper look at themselves and reach out for help. I am finding therapy to be very instrumental in my recovery with food and talking to the people closest to me. They hold alot of answers that I was not able to ask or really willing to. Talking to my mother who I discovered has a eating disorder. MY MOTHER 5'1 no more than 110 ......really eating disorder. She struggles everyday to do the right thing. Remember the apple never falls far from the tree. Let's make one change today and see how it effects our lifes. Today, I am going to enjoy something sweet without guilt.

Dr Oz Show October 8, 2009

As the show I appeared on, gets closer to airing, I have been reflecting on my journey. When the producers first contacted me in June 2009, things have transpired a great deal for me. I know I am not the same person from 90 days ago. With the help of the Doctor Oz show, I have been able to reveal some things that I have not addressed for thirty years. I am starting to understand the eating disorder that plagues my soul. All I can say is wow, I never knew it would open so many doors. With the show about to air in less than twenty-fours hours, I have a little apprehension of how I will appear to the general public. Maybe some will be confused or disgusted by my secretive eating habits, for others a relief that they are not alone. But most importantly, I am not alone in my stuggle to recovery. In the beginning, I worried about all of that. Now, I know I am few steps closer to regaining my life. I hope with me coming forward and telling the world, I can help someone else who struggles everyday like myself. Along this journey, I have alot of people to thank. To my mother, who was honest and upfront about her own struggles. To my sister, who is hand in hand with me on this journey and I support her as well. To my children, who thank god don't have my disorder. Most importantly thank you to Judith Banker (founder)of the Center for Eating Disorders in Ann Arbor, Michgan. You have given me a gift that I could not even imagine giving myself. To the producers of Dr. Oz., Allie - who is as cute as button. Cathy, I know we are sisters from another mother. You rock girl. Dan Durkin - You are hot!!! oops I mean a very nice looking gentlemen tehetehe. I enjoyed the adventure. Most graditude to Dr. Mehmet Oz, probably the only human on earth who gets the right to out me on National TV. Wow. Now it is up to me to change my life and make a difference. I appreciate the tools and the support. Bottom line it's up to me. I am confident that I will succeed. “You only ever grow as a human being if you’re outside your comfort zone.” – Percy Ceru